I am not a marriage expert. I am not a marriage therapist. I am a wife in a big, messy, exciting marriage full of hard work and good times. My husband (aka Hdubs on this blog) is Moroccan. I’m American. (with alot of Polish and German background in my blood) My husband is Muslim and grew up in a Muslim country in a wonderful Muslim family. I am Catholic and grew up in a country of religious freedom (but a small town full of similar people) and a wonderful Catholic family. We fell in love and two choices to make. Follow our heart without using our heads or listen to our heads while we follow our hearts. We choose the second and we had a lot to talk about before we got married. Below is a list of questions that we worked our way through over the course of a year. Before for we started we laid down some ground rounds, I suggest you do too. I listed our in case you wanted an example.
1.You must answer each question.
2.Your answer must be what is honestly in your heart even if it will hurt the other person or is hard to say.
3.We can spend as much or as little time on a question as we need. (sometimes this meant a month or more)
4.Even if we finished with a question if one of us wants to go back we will.
Do you want kids?
How many kids do you want?
Who takes care of the kids?
How do you divide up housework?
What do you value the most?
Do you want a joint bank account or separate accounts? Why?
How do you think the finances should be handled?
What is the most important thing in a marriage?
What do you like about your parents marriage?
What do you not like about your parents marriage?
What do you believe the role of a husband is?
What do you believe the role of a wife is?